saturday november 21

today i ran into a friend - arguably more of a friend of a friend or an acquaintance - who i hadn’t seen in a few months. after we said hi, she said "you look good," which briefly threw me for a loop. obviously, this is a thing people sometimes say when they see each other for the first time in a while, but i’ve only really ever heard it in movies or tv shows, and generally only if those characters haven’t seen each other in years. it had only been about three or four months in this case. was it really a surprise that i still looked okay? did i not look that good before? should i just accept the compliment and stop thinking about it?

friday november 20

today i was setting my fantasy basketball lineup for the coming week and realized there were 11 or 12 guys that i wanted to start, but only 10 available spots. as i agonized over the decision, i idly thought to myself, "it’d almost be better if someone got hurt to make my decision easier." obviously i didn’t actually want to see anyone get injured, but the fact that the thought briefly flickered across my mind clearly created some bad karma, because just a few hours later, jonas valanciunas - the only player on both my fantasy team and my favourite real-life team - broke his hand.


thursday november 19

today i came across this 33,600-piece puzzle on amazon.com, one of the most ridiculous things i’ve ever seen. i consider myself a fan of puzzles, but the idea of putting this one together without, like, a 100-person team, is unfathomable. it says it’s for "ages 12 and up." imagine having a 12-year-old kid and giving him this puzzle. you’d have to hate him so much. "merry christmas, johnny, good luck finding the corner pieces, see you in september."


wednesday november 18

today i was monitoring tweetdeck as usual during my work day, when i noticed three friends in one of my feeds talking about going to a comedy show at bad dog theatre in the evening — two of them, a couple, ultimately decided to go. although i wasn’t mentioned in the discussion thread, i was interested in the show they’d been talking about, and decided to buy a ticket for it. it wasn’t until about an hour before the show that i determined i should probably give them a heads-up that i’d be there as well, and even then, i was hesitant to do so, since it would’ve been much funnier if i’d surprised them at the venue itself, all like, "i’m here for date night!"

tuesday november 17

today i noticed two rats chasing each other around on the subway tracks at yonge station. while i’m typically a bit put off when i spot a single rat scurrying around down there, there was something endearing about seeing a pair of them, so much so that i almost smiled watching them.


monday november 16

today i  was riding the subway along the bloor line, and when we got to the section between ossington and christie stations, an announcement informed us that we’d be going slowly for the next minute or two due to construction. typically these sorts of announcements are robotic and perfunctory, but i really enjoyed the way this guy was infusing some life and creativity into it. when we got through the construction zone and were about to start moving faster again, he announced, "hang on, we’re going to warp speed!"

sunday november 15

today i bought and used a bottle of drain cleaner on my bathroom sink. it was so thoroughly effective that it made me google "how does drain cleaner work" to get some sort of explanation for why it had been such a success in my pipes.

saturday november 14

today i was battling with a candy crush level that had stymied me for the last week, an unusually long amount of time for me to be stuck on a single level. after yet another failed attempt at beating it, the app suddenly closed without warning. assuming it had just crashed for some unknown reason, i re-opened it, and when i went to try the level again, it had been re-designed, with features added or subtracted to make it easier. as far as i can tell, these updates to levels happen periodically to make sure they aren’t too hard or too easy, but i liked the idea of someone from the company keeping an eye on me and being like, "damn, he flew through the first 1267 levels, and it’s taken him a week to beat this one? we gotta go back to the drawing board!"

friday november 13

today i refused to let my girlfriend take an instagram photo of a pizza i’d made because i was so embarrassed by how much room i’d left between the sauce and the edge of the crust. it looked ridiculous.


thursday november 12

today i made a trip to no frills to buy a few groceries and to grab detergent, since i’d run out when i did my laundry earlier this week. after checking out all my items, the cashier picked up my detergent and asked, "do you need this today?" briefly thrown by the unusual question, i replied, "uh…." and before i could say yes or no, she went on to explain: "it’s going on sale tomorrow for $2.97!"

considering i was about to buy the detergent for $6.97, it seemed ridiculous not to wait until tomorrow to get it, especially since i wouldn’t need it for at least a week or two. on the other hand, it’s a pretty heavy thing, and i’d specifically targeted this no frills excursion to buy it, since i didn’t have many other items to carry back to my place — waiting until a future trip to buy it would be an inconvenience.

"ugh," i said after a couple seconds of deliberation. "i’ll just take it."

clearly disapproving of this decision, she muttered, "you could buy two for that price tomorrow" as  i went to pack up my full-price detergent like some sort of decadent king.


wednesday november 11

today i saw a sign outside lansdowne brewery advertising "live music from james brown tomorrow." even though it was just written in chalk on a sandwich board, and there was no way to include a photo or anything, i still felt like this one should’ve been added somehow, just so there was no confusion:


tuesday november 10

today i had a drink with my girlfriend at insomnia. when we received the bill, it looked for a second as if it was blank on both sides, and i briefly wondered if this empty piece of paper was the server’s subtle way of letting us know that - for some reason - our drinks were on the house. however, after looking a little closer at the bill, i realized that the ink was just extremely faded, to the point where it was barely legible. the total was actually more expensive than i thought.

monday november 9

today i spent upwards of five hours monitoring a fascinating discussion thread on the facebook event for a nathan for you q&a scheduled to take place tomorrow. the thread began with the event’s promoter announcing that id's would be checked at the door - even for people with hard-copy tickets - to make sure everyone’s names matched the buyers’ names — this, despite the fact that the wall of the facebook event had been dominated by people selling and trading tickets with one another for weeks, since there was no indication they were non-transferable.

i won’t have any problem with my own ticket to the event, which was bought directly from the source, rather than second-hand. still, i was completely engrossed with the conversation, which featured the promoter feigning ignorance about why this would possibly be a problem, insisting that this policy is in place "literally everywhere," and generally displaying such a level of tone-deafness and ineptitude that several people involved in the discussion suspected it must be some sort of nathan fielder scheme.


sunday november 8

today i was about to cross the street at college and brock when i was approached by a teenager asking for directions to dufferin mall. this initially seemed like a dream scenario for direction-giving, since the dufferin mall is one of my favourite and most frequently-visited places in my area. but as i pointed up brock street and said, "you walk up this way and turn, uh…", i realized i had no idea what the side streets off brock were called. after struggling for a couple seconds, i said, "actually, it’s probably easier to go down to dufferin and walk up from there."

"thanks," he said. "is it the next light?"

"uhh, two lights up," i said. it was the next light.

while i’m sure he found his way there eventually, i wasn't thrilled with my directions. on top of that, after he thanked me and we went our separate ways, i realized it was 5:50pm — 10 minutes until the mall closed. while i consoled myself by speculating that maybe he was just meeting someone there, or maybe he wanted to go to no frills (open until 8) or walmart (open until 9), i couldn’t help but also feel disappointed that i’d failed to mention the hours to him, just in case. i’ll be more prepared next time.

saturday november 7

today i attempted to take the ttc home from queen and yonge, and did the following things:
  • accidentally entered the queen station on the southbound side, rather than northbound, then was too lazy to switch over, opting instead to take it a couple extra stops to st. george instead of bloor-yonge.
  • remembered during the subway ride that there were shuttle buses running from st. george station, and decided i wanted to avoid them.
  • got off at st. patrick station, only to discover that dundas and university was a mess of construction (i don’t even know if the dundas streetcar was officially detouring, but it looked like it would have to be).
  • walked up to queen’s park and college to catch a westbound college streetcar home.
  • realized in retrospect that it would’ve been a much easier ride home if i’d looked anything up beforehand.


friday november 6

today i arrived at descendant for an 8:00 pm reservation for me and seven other people. having arrived first, at almost the exact same time as one of my friends, i looked around the room while we waited for someone to serve us and said, "huh, i wonder where we’re supposed to sit." the small restaurant only sat about 20-25 people to begin with, and it seemed to be packed already, despite the fact that we’d arrived right on time for our reservation. as it turned out, for some reason, they’d taken our reservation down as being for two people, rather than eight, which seemed problematic in a place this small. in the end though, it actually turned out great, because we got to go to a bar down the street to have a drink while we waited to eat (secretly one of my favourite inconveniences, since it means doing one of my favourite things while i wait to do another of my favourite things), and they gave us dessert for free. five stars!


thursday november 5

today i went to send a text message to a friend and noticed that i hadn’t sent or received a single text since monday afternoon. there was a time in my early- and mid-20s when i not only would have noticed this earlier, but i would have assumed my phone had stopped receiving messages altogether, and probably would have had to get a friend to text me just to make sure they were getting through. being 30 is great.


wednesday november 4

today i was buying a handful of groceries and spent several seconds staring at two boxes of multi-grain cheerios, wondering why a 290g box and a 400g box were both listed at the same price, despite the fact that the bigger one didn’t appear to be on sale. the only discernible difference, as far as i could tell, was that the smaller box featured "ancient grains." i ended up opting for the bigger box, taking my chances on the present-day grains providing a better value.

tuesday november 3

today i was walking east along bloor street when i heard a shout from off to my left. i looked over and realized that a guy was asking me for money. he wasn’t standing or sitting on the sidewalk though — he was in the middle of the road, in the process of crossing the street, and wanted to get my attention before i passed by. even though i turned him down, i had to admire the hustle.

monday november 2

today i was working at home when my landlord and the previously-promised bank appraiser showed up at my place. the visit was pretty painless — they were only in my place for about two minutes. still, the appraiser took photos of every room of my place, which made me feel a little uneasy, even though i’m sure whoever ended up seeing those photos probably wouldn’t give nearly as much thought as i did to, for instance, the stuffed animal in my bedroom that i’d won at the ex.


sunday november 1

today i arrived slightly late to the ossington for trivia, so by the time i looked at our image sheet (a collection of photos and other images you have to identify), my team had already filled in every answer. still, they were unsure about one, having guessed that the photo was a young evander holyfield. noticing that our sheet had gotten ripped in a way that tore off "evander"'s ear, i asked if that had been done on purpose to help identify him. apparently it had just been an accident, but we took it as a sign that we had the right answer. turns out it was mr. t though.

saturday october 31

today i received a text at 1:00 am from my brother, asking if troy tulowitzki and ben revere were free agents this winter. guy didn’t even watch baseball three months ago and here he is so engaged in a party conversation about the blue jays that it required an immediate 1:00 am text.


friday october 30

today i cut through the alley next to three speed on my way home from dufferin mall, and - when i arrived on bloor street - ran into a friend who i hadn’t seen for a little while. we talked for a couple minutes, then said our goodbyes, since she was late to get to a friend’s place. of course, immediately after we hugged and said goodbye, we realized we were still heading in the same direction, always an awkward moment.

"should i just duck into this subway here?" i joked, gesturing to the subway restaurant a few doors down from three speed, suggesting that it would be a good way to avoid continuing our post-goodbye walk along bloor street. unfortunately this joke really failed to land when it turned out my friend was going to an apartment that was literally right next door to three speed, making me realize i hadn’t really needed to worry about the post-goodbye awkwardness at all. still, after we parted ways, having now put the idea into my own head, i decided to stop at subway anyway.

thursday october 29

today i went to ali baba’s for a shawarma platter and was shocked to see that they were packaging the platters in different containers than usual — the new containers were plastic and circular, rather than the square styrofoam ones. although i was initially put off by this change - as am i by almost any change to my normal routine - by the time i’d finished eating it, i’d become convinced that these containers actually held more food, and was hoping that they’d stick to the change going forward. i’m a quick convert.

wednesday october 28

today i discovered that i have free access to spotify premium as a result of making changes to my phone plan several weeks ago. gonna listen to so many hyper-specific playlists.

tuesday october 27

today i received an email from my landlord letting me know that an appraiser from the bank would be coming by sometime "this week or next week" to look at the house for "mortgage financing purposes." while i have no problem with the idea of this visit, the lack of specificity about the timing is worrisome. as someone who typically doesn’t exactly dress up while working from home from 9 to 5, this impending drop-in means that for the next week or so, i’ll have to wear pants during my workday, or at least have them nearby.


monday october 26

today i went to harlem for dinner with my girlfriend. we’d made a reservation earlier in the day, despite the fact that we knew we probably didn’t need one on a monday. sure enough, when we arrived, more than half the tables in the place were empty, and when we mentioned that we had a reservation, the server waved a hand as if to say "well, that's not important" and told us to sit anywhere. the unnecessary reservation always makes me feel momentarily silly, like i put way too much effort into planning my night.

sunday october 25

today i saw multiple commercials for popeye’s while watching nfl football. these ads weren’t for the fast-food chicken restaurant, but were for a canadian-based company that sells "nutritional" supplements. still, every time i saw one of these ads, which talked about "transforming" your body, i got a bit of a craving for fried chicken, which probably transforms your body in its own way.


saturday october 24

today i received a notification informing me that my mother has added me as a "trusted contact" on facebook. i think this means i take over her account when she dies?

friday october 23

today i ended up at a sports bar/cafe on dundas west called nossa casa to watch game 6 of the alcs. the place was more charming than i expected, the server was a real gem, and i got to see my friend take off his shirt and start chugging a pitcher of beer after jose bautista’s game-tying home run in the 8th inning. still, it’s hard to imagine ever being able to go back, since my main memory of the night - and, by extension, of the bar - is an overwhelming feeling of sadness as i watched the jays’ season end.

thursday october 22

today i started to get concerned about the fact that i hadn’t received any mail lately. as someone whose pay cheques arrive in the mail, this was a problem for me. however, i wasn’t exactly sure what to look for when i googled the issue — it’s not as if canada post has a ttc-style page of service alerts, as far as i can tell. i ended up trying to figure out if that door-to-door delivery stoppage i’d read about earlier this year had unexpectedly happened already, which led me to stories about canada post’s intentions to try to get the new liberal government to overturn that decision, which led me to other stories about other rulings and decisions the new government may overturn. anyway, no idea why i’m not getting my mail.


wednesday october 21

today i found 60 cents in change in a plastic walmart bag i’d left lying around the house. this was the second time this month that i’d unexpectedly found money in a walmart bag — i discovered a $5 bill in one last week. i have no idea why this keeps happening, unless i’ve briefly blacked out multiple times as i’m leaving walmart and have totally forgotten throwing my change into a bag. it’s like i have a personal tooth fairy, but instead of giving me money for teeth under my pillow, she gives me money for non-essential household items i buy and then don’t put away for weeks.

tuesday october 20

today i went to game 4 of the jays/royals series and scanned my season ticket holder’s card at the stadium entrance. typically, since i just have one ticket on my account, scanning my card results in a single receipt printing out for my single seat. however, today three receipts were printed out. having bought a couple extra pairs of tickets for the series to sell to friends and/or online, i immediately panicked, assuming that i’d left one of the extra pairs on my account/card after selling them, meaning that the pair of tickets i’d "sold" wouldn’t work at the gate. after looking at the receipts more closely though, i noticed that the two extra receipts were for two seats that i didn’t have for the championship series — i’d had them for the division series.

confused, i stopped by a customer service booth on my way to my seat in an effort to make sure that these seats weren’t still mistakenly on my account, and that someone who tried to buy them for this game wouldn’t get turned away at the entrance. the customer service guy had no answers for me, so i headed to my seat, fretting the whole time about whether or not it would be an issue. about 10 minutes later, my friend with a season ticket next to mine showed up, and when i told her the story, she said the exact same thing had happened to her at the gate — she got receipts for her old alds tickets, which shouldn’t be on her account anymore. this came as a real relief, making me relax and forget about the whole thing, since it sounded like the system was just glitchy all around, and no one could blame me for anything.

monday october 19

today i placed a delivery order with mother india at about 4:30pm. the confirmation email indicated that i could expect my food to arrive at 5:50pm, and while some places i order from consistently and easily beat their estimations, mother india isn’t necessarily one of them. since i needed to leave my house by 6:30, i decided to shower shortly after placing the order, rather than waiting until after i ate. by the time i finished showering and got out of the bathroom, it was 4:54pm, and i was getting a phone call from the delivery person, who was outside my door. as i frantically pulled on a shirt and pants before heading to meet her, i marvelled at how the most consistent and effective way to get my delivery orders to arrive in record time was to jump in the shower for a few minutes.

sunday october 18

today i went to the bay with the intention of buying a winter coat, which was something i’d been meaning to do for a long time. after browsing for a few minutes, there were only a handful of coats that i could see myself wearing, and one of them was so expensive that the price tag made me do sort of do a double-take. still, as i tried on other jackets, i couldn’t get that really expensive one out of my mind, sensing that maybe it was the perfect one for me. i was convinced that it was one of those scenarios where if i tried it on, i’d have to buy it, despite my better judgment, because it’d just be that good. when i finally decided to take a chance and go for it, i barely got the coat on before realizing that it was too bulky and had way too many zippers for my liking. i was glad i tried it though — would've haunted me if i'd bought another one without at least considering going really big.


saturday october 17

today i bought some blueberries as part of a bigger grocery-shop at no frills. as i was checking out, the cashier rang the blueberries through, then sort of tossed them toward the little grocery conveyer belt in such a way that the lid flew open and blueberries went everywhere. i immediately made a noise of exclamation (like an "ah!") when i saw this happen, but the cashier didn’t hear me and - having somehow failed to notice what she’d done - continued ringing the rest of my groceries through. briefly unsure of how to react, i made a second noise that sounded embarrassingly similar to the groan tina from bob’s burgers makes when she’s anxious. i eventually pulled myself together and handled things like an adult, getting a new thing of blueberries, but it wasn’t my proudest moment up until that point.

friday october 16

today i had a dream that i was doing a stand-up comedy routine in a sort of high-school classroom setting. at one point, i performed a risky, progressive bit that required me to leave the room for 15-20 seconds, then return for the punchline. but when i came back, i discovered that the class had moved on to something else, seemingly having concluded that my set was finished. please don’t analyze my dreams.

thursday october 15

today i was so excited and amped up following the blue jays’ game 5 alds win that i didn’t go to bed until 1:45 am, then stayed awake another 30 minutes, unable to get to sleep, then woke up in the morning 20 minutes before my alarm went off.


wednesday october 14

today i attended the best baseball game of my life.

tuesday october 13

today i was walking down lansdowne toward college when a girl ran by me in the opposite direction. as she passed me, she stopped, turned to me, and asked me something. not hearing her, i asked her to repeat herself, and she breathlessly asked, "is there a subway this way?" pointing toward bloor, i replied, "oh yeah, at the next light."

although i initially viewed this as another successful direction-giving moment for me, doubts began nagging at me as i continued my walk. she’d been so out of breath from running that i wasn’t 100% sure i’d heard her correctly even the second time, and if i had heard her correctly, who’s to say she hadn’t been referring to subway, the popular submarine sandwich shop? i hoped i’d steered her in the right direction, because when i gave my answer, she seemed dismayed that she still had to run so far. imagine how much worse she would’ve felt if she got to bloor and realized i’d given her directions to something entirely wrong.

monday october 12

today i was leaving my house to meet up with some friends to watch game 4 of the jays/rangers series when i ran into my next-door neighbour wayne and his friend john doing some yard work outside. we had a brief conversation about the series, which involved me mentioning that brett cecil was out with a torn calf. "he can’t still pitch?" john asked incredulously, apparently feeling that as long as a pitcher’s arm is fine, there’s no reason why he shouldn’t be able to play. i briefly tried to explain why the legs are pretty important for a pitcher too, but he still seemed skeptical.

sunday october 11

today i went to the contender with a group of friends to watch game 3 of the jays/rangers series. i drank five beers over the course of the evening, then at the end of the night, i waited until everyone else had settled up, one or two at a time, before i paid for my share. by the time i paid, there was only one beer left on our bill, which i assume was the result of some shaky service throughout the night, rather than my friends overpaying. waiting until the end to pay your part of a big group bill is always a risk, but sometimes it really pays off to roll the dice, you know?

saturday october 10

today i went to my local polling station to cast my vote for the upcoming federal election. as i was getting set up to vote, the poll clerk pointed to my blue jays hat and started talking to me about the playoffs. we both agreed that the jays, despite being down 2-0 in the alds, could still come back and win it, though he was a little more certain than me that they would. by the time our conversation ended and i found myself in the voting station, i realized i’d been so distracted by the jays talk that i wasn’t sure whether to fill to cast my vote with an "x" or by filling in the entire circle. not wanting to pop back out and ask, i decided to hedge my bets by doing an x, then sort of shading in the entire circle behind the x. i’m sure it was fine.


friday october 9

today i was approached by two different people on the street on my way home from the jays game to ask whether or not toronto had won, and had to deliver the bad news to both of them. as sad as i was, it made it even worse to have to pass that sadness on to others, watching their faces fall as i told them the score.

thursday october 8

today i briefly engaged in a conversation with an older woman as i took the elevator up to the 14th floor in my friend’s apartment building. she got off a couple floors before me, and when she did, she said "happy anniversary!" before kicking herself and saying "happy thanksgiving!" instead. having not even really considered that thanksgiving was around the corner, or that it was one of those holidays where people would tell you to have a "happy" one several days in advance, i had no idea what she’d even meant to say when she said "happy anniversary," so it was a truly baffling and wonderful two seconds before she corrected herself.

wednesday october 7

today i checked my mail and found my latest pay cheque from major league baseball there. for the first time all year, the cheque had been placed in the envelope in such a way that the amount was showing through the little window at the front, which bothered me a bit. even though it’s unlikely that they’d care, it seemed probable that my housemates had glanced at the envelope to determine who the mail was for and had seen the amount, and i didn’t want them jumping to any conclusions about my earnings based on a cheque from a part-time job.


tuesday october 6

today i needed to grab a few groceries, but didn’t have time to get them and then get back home before meeting up with some friends at the derby. the only way i'd have time was if i made my grocery run on my way to the bar, which is what ultimately decided to do. while it felt a little weird to bring a grocery-filled backpack to a bar, i was glad i made sure not to buy anything that needed to be immediately refrigerated or frozen, lest i turn into mark in that one peep show episode.

monday october 5

today i was planning to go for a run, but - not being accustomed to running in seasons besides the summer - wasn’t sure how to dress for the cold weather. after agonizing over different combinations, i settled on one and headed out, only to have my run cut short about 10 minutes later because of increasingly troublesome shin splints. it was probably for the best — the clothes i’d worn were way too warm.

sunday october 4

today i realized that before i'd left my house for the night on saturday, i’d put leftover spring rolls from a thai-food order in the fridge, but hadn’t dug deeper into the takeout bag and grabbed the sauce for them as well, meaning the sauce had been sitting on my kitchen counter overnight. curious about whether this sweet thai sauce would "go bad" if it went unrefrigerated for that long, i spent some time on my way home googling it, and was satisfied to find that it probably wouldn’t matter. when i got home and went to eat the spring rolls though, i poked around in the bag and - after all that - found that the restaurant had neglected to give me the sauce anyway.

saturday october 3

today i was heading toward the subway when i saw a guy walking in the opposite direction veer into my path, as if he wanted to get my attention. while he didn’t look particularly sketchy, i was walking quickly and was in a hurry, so i put up my hand and shook my head when he started talking, as if i were turning down someone on the street asking for money. rather than asking for money though, he gestured to a nearby pal and said, "hey, my friend thinks you’re cute and wants your number," making my dismissive reaction sort of funny. still, i got the impression that this comment was his idea of a hilarious joke, since he and his friends - based on my snap judgment - seemed like the type of bros who still call each other "gay" as an insult, so i was glad that i’d had an "i don’t have time for this shit" response before even recognizing that.